Art · COFFEE · DISCUSS. · Funny · Holidays · October 2014

Portable Parlour Game of the Week: Tattoo Watch

Stories no one wants to hear: Why Francesca Can Write a Blog Post But Can’t Publish Her Blood of Olympus Review, Why Flip Flop Blisters Won’t Heal and When Another Frappe Is Too Many Frappes: A Saga.

What larks eh. You know what I like about being in a warm country? The popular parlour game Tattoo Watch. It’s free, it’s funny and the only issue is when you find a piece cute but someone you’re with thinks it makes the wearer a pillock. I’m sitting on my own, so I’m free to play covert ops behind my phone.

There’s a bloke a couple of tables away who got either a Pegasus, an eagle or a very angry sparrow on his forearm about twenty years ago. I can also see a person with what could be part of a crucifix or an upside-down sword on their shoulder blades. A few years ago my dad and I actually got binoculars out to establish whether a bloke had the Grim Reaper or the Batman logo on his back.

I can’t remember which it was.

If I ever get inked, I want something like the Fair Trade logo, which looks like tadpoles from a distance and turns out to be a little dude waving. I’ll get a cute spiral on the small of my back which up close says ‘STOP STARING, CREEP’.

Maybe not. So, who likes playing Tattoo Watch? Has anyone been an object in the game? Or have you made any really loud comments about a pice that turned out to be a skin complaint? Share your stories, snowflakes, we could make a collection of anecdotes.

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COFFEE · Frnkiero · G. Way · Indifferent Ignorance · Magazines · MCRmy · Music · My Chemical Romance (get a category) · September 2014 · Social Media · Tumblr

Five-ish Ways to Celebrate Five Years of Blogging: MCR Poster & Magazine Giveaway

Despite the plethora of wonderful ideas you all had for how I could celebrate Indifferent Ignorance turning five, I have come up with my own celebration. It’s called Five-ish Ways to Celebrate Five Years of Blogging and is coming to an Internet-connected device near you between now and November!

I say five-ish things because I’m not completely sure if a couple of them will come to fruition or when, so check back regularly to see which number we’re on.

The first thing is on Tumblr now, because I thought it would be funny if my first blog celebration was held on my scrubbly little non-blog (I don’t get out much). Plus I need to post it before I go to Greece. It hurts my heart to part with MCR possessions, but it turns out that a couple of the magazines were spares anyway, and those posters deserve to be put up somewhere, hence the giveaway.

The next four or so things will be revealed in good time, ie when I’ve put them together. Right, I’m off to drink some coffee and celebrate entering my last year of teenage-dom. I’m kind of bummed that I’ve only got a year to change the lyrics of Teenagers to “we” instead of “they”, and only a year to use “I’m a teenager” as an excuse for being rude to people, but so far 19 is looking peaceful and productive.

Probably because I’ve done little but write copy for zoos and look at MCR merch.

COFFEE · DISCUSS. · January 2014 · The Eleven O'Clock News

The Eleven O’Clock News: Dog Snuggles Help Students.

Recently I’ve been the sort of busy that makes me think of people in the City clutching Starbucks at six am with their clacking heels and superduper handbags and eighteen hour days. I don’t have the clacking heels and I’m working on finding the perfect handbag but eighteen hour days are becoming quite normal. Which is okay, because it means that Life Stuff is happening. You know, writing essays and making plans and trying to find the ideal washing machine/tumble drier time system.

Don’t overload the washing machine; your jeans will take two days to drip dry because tumble driers aren’t actually a gift from God.

Anyway, that’s all good. I can go to bed with a sense of achievement, you know, because I’ve revised so well that my grey cells are dancing and I’m organising my homework properly and I can sleep knowing that this is life, ladies and gentlemen, and I am living it to the full with every one of those eighteen hours used to their maximum potential…

Except they’re not because a) I can’t sleep properly, which means that b) between the hours of ten and twelve and four and seven I am basically a zombie, which means that c) I’m consuming twice as much caffeine and sugar as usual to work properly, which means that d) I can’t sleep properly. I’m also starting to worry about my arteries.

Oh and it’s affecting my concentration. During the making of this post I have so far taken two BBC quizzes, made my bed, checked Tumblr and Googled handbags. It’s getting to the point where sitting still, quietly, isn’t an option – I’ve had Sherlock on in the background while I work for the last week (all live TV has adverts, which means I’ll switch over, which means I’ll get even more distracted). So is it that if I learnt to concentrate or made myself work fewer hours I’d find it easier to concentrate and therefore work fewer hours?

You know what, these handbags are cutsie.

Right, right, the news.

Well, some universities have provided opportunities for students to cuddle animals as a way to combat stress. I know for a fact that dog snuggles are an excellent method for coping with anything, except maybe fleas, so well done universities for cottoning on. I did a few searches about meditation, which I do because Emma Watson suggested an app on Twitter that is actually incredibly helpful (except I keep forgetting to do it) and there seems to be a general consensus that mindfulness is good. Plus nobody has any, possibly because we’re all watching Sherlock while filing papers and triple-checking our iPads for work-related emails. Apparently stress-related illness is now such a big thing that companies have decided it’s in their interest to promote healthy living – some are even investing in gadgets that measure employees’ stress levels.

Hmm.

You know, I’m not quite sure what I’m trying to say here, because busy people struggling with being busy isn’t exactly up there with the Syrian refugee crisis or potential CAR genocide. It’s marginally more interesting than, say, Bieber getting arrested… but a large part of me knows that if I turned off all my electrics, tidied up the trail of crap I’ve left around the house and went for a run (don’t look at me like that, Tim says it’s a good idea), things would be better. Less existential angst, less chance of contracting a cold and more productivity for my time. Possibly with more time spent sleeping, or giving Sherlock my undivided attention.

Remind me that I have a really great header for a blog post that involves Benedict Cumberbatch’s film career. I was going to use it in a six degrees of separation post about King Lear.

Okay, I’d better turn off all my electrics and pencil in time for a run. Thoughts about how to be busy and well and sleep occasionally?

COFFEE · December 2013 · Holidays · Music · Videos

Tag Your Posts When You’re Fully Awake.

So my Pilates class is from eight until nine on Thursday and I usually trot home and go to bed because it’s so relaxing all my bones and joints curl up like small creatures hibernating, but today we had pie and lattes for Christmas, so I will probably fall asleep when it’s time to wake up.

You should suffer with me.

Wrapping.

COFFEE · Complaints · November 2013 · Videos

Popcorn Versus Pumpkins

So it’s November, and we’ve got men growing creepy moustaches and writers attempting to put together an entire novel together in thirty days and I’m pretty sure the Stoptober failures victims not-quit-people have bought their weight in tobacco in the last few days. The last of the Hallowe’en sweets are being eaten/discarded and Strictly‘s getting sparklier.

I don’t have a moustache (hopefully), my novels are never, ever going to be done in a month (I’m not that dude from that Bradley Cooper film) and I don’t smoke. I think we threw out the gross popcorn. Eh.

Anyway, the second half term of the year started today – which means lots more essays, woolly gloves and crawling home to read a nice book in bed, nursing my arthritic joints like the old lady I will someday be. Ahh, hot chocolate. Mist. Christmas shopping. MSI show really soon. Here is a video of a porcupine eating a pumpkin to help with the “Brr, it’s getting cold” blues. The porcupine’s name is Ted.

Art · COFFEE · Indifferent Ignorance · Internet · Lists · October 2013

Blog Years/Dog Years: Fun Indifferent Ignorance-Based Activities for Your Half Term

Tomorrow is four years to the day that I started Indifferent Ignorance, which makes her a decade older than me in dog (and, I think, Internet) years.

Yes, she is a “she”.

Halloween isn’t traditionally a time for reflection, but we’re at the point now where this site is A Part of My Life. As in, I cite her (okay it is weird) on job applications since I’ve spent most of my teenage years doing Interwebz stuff. Ah, the joys of youth.

Anyway, snowflakes, this is not a time to be sitting idle. Well it sort of is because it’s half term and I’m tired – but one must not rest on one’s blogging laurels, even if they are pretty damn shiny. So, some news:

  • There are custom email addresses for this site! If you want to email me about a potential blog topic, such as a story for The Six O’clock News, or if you think you’d like to utilise my knack of typing way too much, email transmissions@indifferentignorance.com. If you’d like to send me marriage requests, cutesy photos of small animals, letters detailing the positive impact my site has made on your wellbeing, etc., email tobequitefrank@indifferentignorance.com. I’ll reply unless you come under the category of “fucking creepy” and/or “fucking irritating”, and of course will never share your private details (unless you’re so fucking creepy that I think you ought to be investigated by Operation Yew Tree).
  • Some of my more art-based, er, art, is now for sale on Etsy! The money raised will go back into Indifferent Ignorance for its upkeep since I am dirt poor. Hopefully in the future I will be able to make physical site merchandise and/or art available, but until then some of my stuff’s available for digital download for about half the price of the average coffee. Please let me know what you think about the products and price, since there’s not much point in the whole venture if you lot don’t care!
  • I have acquired an Instagram account so I can pretend to be MCR and tease y’all with sometimes-filtered images pertaining to projects I’m doing. I’m only sixty per cent sure how Instagram works so it’ll be… interesting.
  • Formspring has rebranded itself Spring.me and since I’m too lazy to make an ask.fm account I’ve revamped my ‘Spring’ profile. Let’s get philosophical, snowflakes.
  • I’ve got a new semi-serious story up on FictionPress. It’s in its very, very early stages – as in, I’m already working out how to edit the published chapters – but I would really, really appreciate it if you could take the time to have a read and leave a review. It can be anonymous and you can leave a review per chapter or just one when you’ve finished, but this means more to me than Etsy or email addresses or anything like that, because I’m only going to improve as a writer if people leave feedback. Art is a two-way street and all that…

Happy Halloween!

Books · COFFEE · Food · July 2013 · Photogenius · School *choke*

Occasional Tea and Rarely-Spotted Cake

Lately I’ve been having a bit of a problem with starting posts and not finishing them so I’ve made a cup of tea to help with the old creative juices. I’ve consumed more today than I usually do in a month (tea is for socialising and coffee is for work; I have at least one coffee at least six days a week) although I was drinking it in a Politics lesson under the guise of working… Although to be honest, Friday Week A last period has always been a bit of a guise, especially when we did voting systems and had to count.

Today was a tea and cake lesson, because it is correct, when one reads a newspaper, to drink tea – especially if one is in a class with twenty other people and international relations needs to be taught. It was also my teacher’s last ever lesson in my school because it’s more fun/intellectually stimulating for him to finish his PhD and work in Malaysia instead of sitting in a classroom in deepest Essex explaining the history of the Liberal Democrats to seventeen-year-olds. Can’t think why. So instead of discussing international relations we gave him presents. Ah, summer.

This hot drink thing really is conducive to work… When I said tea is for socialising, I temporarily ignored my reasonably frequent coffee shop stops with Ellen and/or Isobel when we huddle in a corner of Costa and discuss everyone we’ve ever met in great detail. I do think, however, that if there were a tea shop in our high street we’d go to that instead. Actually there is a tea shop and I’ve been there once. Well, Ellen doesn’t like hot drinks anyway; maybe we should spread our custom around a bit.

Eeyore in Costa

There’s actually a great building just off the main shops that part of me wants to buy, do up and convert into a bookshop and tea and coffee place. I think it’d specialise in second-hand books, and there would be a ‘bring a book, take a book’ system for people with cash flow problems (which is everyone). The teas and coffees would also be suitable for those with special dietary needs (which isn’t everyone but I flipping miss eating those almond biscuits you sometimes get on your saucer). There would maybe be a space for art shows and one for people to just sit and read for as long as they want as long as they purchase a beverage.

I think I may have just invented the library.

COFFEE · Holidays · Indifferent Ignorance · Internet · July 2013 · My Family and Other Animals · School *choke*

The Tentative Return of Rambling Posts

I must say, I’ve quite missed Sunday blogging. There’s nothing like sitting amongst Saturday’s mess with a mug of coffee and half-hatched weekend plans, writing nonsense and posting it on the Internet for your friends to read. Although it’s been a while since I’ve sat amongst Wednesday’s mess and written to you all, actually, or Monday’s mess, or Friday’s… I’m not even sure when to start a new paragraph, if I’m honest.

Let’s do it now and start another straight away for kicks.

It’s been a while since I’ve been properly focussed on Indifferent Ignorance, and she’s starting to feel like the spare room in our house that my brother just moved out of in favour of better lights and warmer radiators. Not that her lights were faulty – and I like to think she’s always been cosy – but she’s feeling as though she has that unique spare-room quality of dusty door frames, dead flies on the windowsills and stuff that never quite got sorted out. It’s probably my own fault; partway through what was proving to be a crap year I thought “let’s give her a facial and buy some customisation tools from WP”, not realising that I was fast losing my money, my time and my will to do anything except play with Fred and Donnie. So as I lost motivation, she lost her once-frequent updates and here we are four months later with my first post in a fortnight and a serious need to open an Internet window.

Now, though, things are slowing down. I only have two pieces of homework to do (and a shitload of extra-curricular and/or exam-based admin, but we’ll take that slowly) and when we go out later to celebrate Ellen’s birthday I won’t be stewing over my Psychology coursework in a corner, because that was last weekend at a different birthday celebration. By the last academic year’s standards, I’m basically on holiday. Which I actually will be soon!

I’ve been concentrating on a lot of different things lately, from school to physiotherapy to my lack of post-school plans to trying to find some sort of job that doesn’t involve retail or administration (hint: there are none) because it was sitting and typing and pressing cash machine-like screens that made me need physio in the first place… I’ve been getting so frantic that writing that sentence actually made my heart rate increase. And if I’ve learnt one thing this year it’s that short-term stress is good but long-term stress is bad. I’ve also learnt that Islamic fundamentalism was started by an Egyptian teacher who went to the US and basically pulled a Holden Caulfield, but I think that’s an anti-racism rant for another day.

I just went downstairs to take a photograph of Sprout for this post, but he’s looking very much like my mum got a bit overenthusiastic when she was watering the plants so I think it’ll wait until he is restored to his former glory. I should also make a start on clearing Saturday’s mess, which is nearing the ‘health and safety issue’ end of the untidy spectrum. So, hopefully there will not be another two weeks between posts – I’ve had two or three in my head or in draft form for a while that I just need to write, goddamn it – but the weather’s been so pretty that they might have to wait for me to get bored of sunshine.

In which case nothing I do on the Internet has any hope of being worked upon.